I can relate very strongly with what you are saying. Here's my advice: Don't screw up.

I mean, I've made a lot of mistakes in life trying to scratch that itch. Usually they revolve around the idea tha some kind of dramatic action needs to be taken. It doesn't. Rarely does it.

I sounds like you and I share an inner buzz -- it doesn't go away overnite no matter what you do. I promise. It takes years and years.

So take it easy. Get you excitement in measured doses. Plan a trip to Europe. Find a really pleasant and attractive hooker. Drink yourself silly once a month. But don't rearrange your life much and don't take any radical steps to quell the storm inside.

Counseling doesn't hurt, either.

wolfen