Thread

A number of reasons why the chicken crossed the road.

MacNN Software 39 posts Jul 10, 2004 to Jul 13, 2004

#1 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 17:32 MacNN

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

SAEED AL SAHAF - Iraqi Head of Information
The chicken did not cross the road.
This is a complete fabrication.
In fact, we do not even have a chicken.

GEORGE W BUSH
We don't care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
The chicken is either for us or against us.
There is no middle ground.

COLIN POWELL
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image
ofthe chicken crossing the road.

TONY BLAIR
I agree with George.

HANS BLIX
We have reason to believe there may be potential for this chicken
capability, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the
other side of the road.

DR SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed I've not been told.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
I env ision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

TRICIA
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it
felt accomplishing its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens, crossing all the roads.
You may say I'm a dreamer - but its not the only hen.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX
It was an historic inevitability.

ARSENE_ WENGER
What chicken? I did not see it.

ALEX FERGUSON
The chicken was not drawn to the other side fairly, and no one Beckham
is bigger than this club.

SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the
road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
eChicken2003 will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your
important documents, and balance your cheque book - and internet
explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath
the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
What is your definition of chicken?

THE BIBLE
And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken THOU SHALT
CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road, and there was
rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS
Did I miss one?

HOMER_ SIMPSON
Mmmmmmmmm . . . . c h i c k e n

Maybe years old. Still funny though.

#2 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 17:40 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:

Maybe years old. Still funny though.

Kidding, I like the Bush quote

#3 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 17:45 MacNN

Ah, that was worth repeating. Maybe it made the rounds before, but it's still a goodie.

#4 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 17:52 MacNN

Ahh, remember the days when all people did was forward stuff like this to each other?

Naturally LBK gets a pass because she was like 7 at the time...

#5 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 17:54 MacNN

That's a classic.

#6 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 17:57 MacNN

Cool post lil'babykitten.

#7 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 19:01 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by paully dub:
Naturally LBK gets a pass because she was like 7 at the time...

heh

#8 Sat, 10 Jul 2004 - 19:09 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by paully dub:
Ahh, remember the days when all people did was forward stuff like this to each other?

Naturally LBK gets a pass because she was like 7 at the time...

When? 1996?

#9 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 01:31 MacNN

A classic, haven't read that in ages

#10 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 04:57 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by paully dub:
Naturally LBK gets a pass because she was like 7 at the time...

#11 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:22 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by Peter:

That's off.

This was way before the old timeline graphic.

#12 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:22 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:

in other news, your nick is cute

#13 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:23 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by Spheric Harlot:
That's off.

This was way before the old timeline graphic.

pfft. Do you want a disclamer on it too?

#14 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:24 MacNN

First time seeing it for me. I lawled.

#15 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:31 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by Peter:
pfft. Do you want a disclamer on it too?

Oh sorry.

I didn't realize that the chicken had exceeded your allotted daily humor allowance.

-s*

#16 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:41 MacNN

My favourite:

HEMINGWAY:

To die. In the rain. Alone.

#17 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:50 MacNN

A few more:

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

LOUIS FARRAKHAN:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

L.A. POLICE DEPARTMENT:
Give us five minutes with the chicken and we'll find out.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

MACHIAVELLI:
The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

#18 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 05:53 MacNN

First time for me too... Very

But who's "Tricia"?

#19 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 06:40 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by Peter:
in other news, your nick is cute

thanky!

Quote:

Originally posted by Ois�n:
First time for me too... Very

But who's "Tricia"?

I think she's a chat show host.

#20 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 07:41 MacNN

I've seen some of these before, but not all.

Good thing you explained "Tricia". I was thinking Tricia Nixon...??!
And good additions by soul searching

#21 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 10:34 MacNN

LBK:
It crossed the road because that kitten was looking mighty hungry.
theolein:
Remaining objective about the chicken is almost impossible. You have to look at the chicken's background and place that into context....
Zimbo:
That chicken was just a projection
Ca$h:
**** the chicken! It saw me coming in my Neon.
SimeyTheLimey:
I studied chickens for 7 years, you know.
WDLove:
I sincerely hope that the chicken crossed the road safely.
DemondHood:
There are live chickens and there are dead chickens. This one's dead. And it tastes good too.
Tooki:
That chicken is exceeding the maximum allowed width of 460 pixels.

#22 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 10:51 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by theolein:
LBK:
It crossed the road because that kitten was looking mighty hungry.
theolein:
Remaining objective about the chicken is almost impossible. You have to look at the chicken's background and place that into context....
Zimbo:
That chicken was just a projection
Ca$h:
**** the chicken! It saw me coming in my Neon.
SimeyTheLimey:
I studied chickens for 7 years, you know.
WDLove:
I sincerely hope that the chicken crossed the road safely.
DemondHood:
There are live chickens and there are dead chickens. This one's dead. And it tastes good too.
Tooki:
That chicken is exceeding the maximum allowed width of 460 pixels.

You people know each other too well...

#23 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 10:59 MacNN

If we're talking about the same one, then Tricia is Trisha. She does a Ricki Lake type show on TV in Britain. Same old junk as the American shows, without the yank accents

.

By the way, I hadn't seen the chicken crossing ther road thing before, very funny.

#24 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 11:02 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by theolein:

WDLove:
I sincerely hope that the chicken crossed the road safely.

hee hee....

#25 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 11:25 MacNN

Quote:

OY you! I had the exact same idea in mind!

ZIMPHIRE:

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:
Why

Spin. 100% silly.

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:
Did the Chicken Cross

I never said it did you're projecting

Quote:

Road

Rascist!!!1!!!!!!!one!!one!!111

LERKFISH:

-

Last edited by Lerkfish on 05-26-2004 at 09:23 PM

SIMEYTHELIMEY:

I saw a chicken cross the road once when I was in the army - it was my seventh year there.

DCOLTON:

I see no evidence of a chicken crossing the road - all I hear is a lot of apologists that seem to want the chicken to have crossed the road. I want to see photos.

THEOLEIN:

How the fu�k should I know why the fu�king chicken crossed the f�cking road?

LOGIC:

SPLIFFDADDY:

What is Iceland going to do about it?

SOD OF SADR / UDAY'S CARCASS / DEAD-GUY-OF-THE-MONTH:

HAHAHA! Filthy, terrorist appeasing, European chicken - rot in your apostatic, socialist paradise!

JOHN F.SMITH:

What's your favorite chicken?, why?

#26 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 11:31 MacNN

#27 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 11:38 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:
SPLIFFDADDY:
What is Iceland going to do about it?

JOHN F.SMITH:
What's your favorite chicken?, why?

Genius, you are!

Spliffdaddy:
My chicken is overclocked to cross the road at least twice as fast as the Apple chicken, and it's much cheaper, too. Plus it has these copper wings.

#28 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 11:39 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:
LERKFISH:

-

Last edited by Lerkfish on 05-26-2004 at 09:23 PM

that one is awesome

#29 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 12:42 MacNN

thePurpleGiant:
Photoshop chicken crosses the road.

#30 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 13:04 MacNN

Just to get to the other side, wanting to see what it doesn't have.

#31 Sun, 11 Jul 2004 - 14:06 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:
OY you! I had the exact same idea in mind!

ZIMPHIRE:

Spin. 100% silly.

I never said it did you're projecting

Rascist!!!1!!!!!!!one!!one!!111

Quote:

LERKFISH:

-

Last edited by Lerkfish on 05-26-2004 at 09:23 PM

#32 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 04:06 MacNN

Oisin:
In Beijing chickens cross the road because my flat is so small and ugly.

Voyageur:
Is that a sea gerkin or is that a chicken?

Gorickey:
Gorickey says the chicken made a home run.

#33 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 04:10 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by lil'babykitten:
LOGIC:

#34 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 07:11 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by theolein:
Voyageur:
Is that a sea gerkin or is that a chicken?

AaagH, you! I will never live that picture down!

Where is the red-faced smilie when you need it?

#35 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 07:17 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by voyageur:
Where is the red-faced smilie when you need it?

Will this do?

#36 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 07:20 MacNN

Thanks, lbk--I'll save that one. Somehow I have a feeling I'll be needing it again in the future.....

#37 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 07:28 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by theolein:
Gorickey:
Gorickey says the chicken made a home run.

Well done.

#38 Mon, 12 Jul 2004 - 19:31 MacNN

Quote:

Originally posted by voyageur:
Thanks, lbk--I'll save that one. Somehow I have a feeling I'll be needing it again in the future.....

Sorry, just my mind playing tricks on me again, honest

#39 Tue, 13 Jul 2004 - 15:10 MacNN

KELLY HOGAN:
**** off with these questions! Do you have any idea who I am?